Oh, now. How hot is Deena looking, guys? Hot, right? Between the injections, the diet pills, and the chemical peels, I thought she had this “alluring” thing on lockdown, but with these fancy new teeth? Man. If hotness could be gauged and charted, well. Deena Nicole Cortese would be off the charts. Thing is, though, Deena claims that she hasn’t had any plastic surgery. Nope, she chalks her brand-new look up to eyebrow sculpting and eyeshadow. All about the eyes, folks. From Deena’s Twitter:
just to let ya know, I have not got any plastic surgery..yes in the past i have had a nose job..and i am not against plastic surgery at all..i have thought about getting it redone to round the tip but haven’t yet..and don’t know if I am..I am not afraid to ADMIT i got plastic surgery so if I do.. I’ll let u know.. I thinned my eyebrows..and lost weight thanks to the [shill diet].. and learned how to do my makeup..lighter eye shadow brings out my eyes..and highlight under my eyes gives an effect of higher cheek bones.. the end. If I get the nose job I’ll let ya know =]
Also, she claims that she got Lumineers, not to be confused with veneers, through which your teeth need to be shaved. Shaved. No, Lumineers are snap-on teeth, and what better, longer-lasting thing to have than actual teeth?
“I just have to sit there, you know, kind of straight-faced with a massive internal eye roll. I feel like throwing up when I hear it. No, I shouldn’t say that. No, actually, I do feel like throwing up. I wish I could say, ‘Oh listen, everybody! It’s the Celine Dion song!’ But I don’t. … Everytime I go into a bar where there’s a live pianist or into a restaurant … it’s thrilling for people to surprise me with the Celine Dion song. I did a talkshow in Italy recently where they had a live pianist who started gently playing the theme song, and I was severely urged to go and sing it as if I had in fact sung it myself…. ‘I’m not going to.’ It rather haunts me, the song.”
Oh, girl. This. Yes. See, I was on to this business when the movie first came out back in 97, when I was fourteen years old. I loved the movie but I was like, “God, Celine Dion, really? Like, Celine Dion as in Up Close Personal, quite possibly one of the worst f-cking movies of all time?” Call me trend-forward for my age back then – or just, you know, a smug and superior little bitch – but I knew that this song was going to come back and bite everyone involved with the production of the movie on the ass. Because it’s dumb.
If it makes you feel any better, Kate, this song was played at my Senior Prom as, like, one of the last songs of the night. I’m guessing it was to make the evening more memorable than it should have been (I don’t remember; I was pretty lit up the second half of the night), but the only thing I do remember is being in the bathroom as this song played, smoking … a cigarette.
Anyway. I guess what I really wanted to say is that we’re in the same boat, Kate. Ha. Get it? The same ‘boat’? Yeah. I know.
From Us Weekly:
What says “I love you” more than having your girlfriend’s name tattooed on your nether region? Nothing, if you’re Jennifer Lopez’s boyfriend, Casper Smart.
According to a friend, Casper surprised J.Lo with this token of his affection – and she was thrilled with the latest addition to his already inked-up body!
“Jennifer thinks Casper’s tattoos are sexy, but this one is her favorite, for obvious reasons,” her friend says. “She loves it, and she loves him.”
It’s a lovefest all around, according to another source, who says Casper’s friends and family have become “obsessed” with his high-profile relationship. One wrote on his Facebook wall: “All of you mom and dad’s friends are living vicariously through you” after Casper posted a photo of him with J.Lo. And his mom has even renamed herself Shawna Lopaz!
First of all, this is the second day in a row that we’ve had the word ‘penis’ in the title of a post. Do I see a trend happening? WIN.
Second, please, please let this be true, because it’s probably one of the most ridiculous, pathetic things I’ve ever heard in life, and I live for that kind of garbage.
J. LO AND CASPER TRUE LOVE FOREVER, Y’ALL.*
*Or at least until she wears the ink away! -winkwinknudgenudge-